Fierce Miss Jude

whatshouldwecallme:

Since I am full of Christmas cheer and the spirit of forgiveness, I think it is a good time to grant an official pardon to Secretary Clinton for the fashion crimes of epic proportions committed in years past. 

If you know me at all, followers of the Fierce Factor, you know that I routinely spew hatred and disgust towards Hillary’s uninspired pantsuits, sad and mannish hairstyles, and unfortunate overall fashion choices.

But, I confess: Hillary is slowly but surely redeeming herself. 

Look at the pictures (I will post them right now) from her recent visit to Burma and you will see the impossible for yourselves. 

GONE, I tell you, GONE are the days of helmet hair. Her hair is now shoulder length, pulled back into a nice womanly ponytail, and, in fact, Newsweek recently published a picture in which a PEARL STUDDED SCRUNCHIE graced her golden locks! 

WHAT WHAT WHAT?

Could it be? Dare I dream of a world in which Hillary Clinton is….a beacon of style and exemplary fashion sense? 2012 may, indeed, prove to be the year of the [fashion] Apocalypse.

To Hillary: I humbly submit my apologies for the many years of pantsuit scrutiny.

Don’t fail me, girl. 

xo Fierce Miss Jude

HOWEVER.

that does not give you automatic license to wear your footie pajamas in any public arena you wish.

please.

respect the fierce factor.

birdsong5800 asked: Dear Fierce Miss Jude: Hunting season is upon us. I know that it is imminent having spotted many more people than normal wandering through Walmart sporting their full camo regalia(-I think that they might be breaking it in, perhaps in the hopes of avoiding chafing in the deer blind-). Miss Fierceness, my question is, how does one rock those florescent orange accessories that seem to be a MUST if you want to go out for a walk and return without your "gut fulla lead",so to speak. Please advise.

Dear Birdsong, We here at Fierce Miss Jude are thrilled to hear your dulcet tones this morning! This question could not be asked at a better time, and though my current urban/suburban place of residence does not seem to mandate fluorescent orange accessories to the extent as does my homeland—the extreme hinterlands of Michigan—I will try to report what I know about this topic, this breach of fashion code, this violation of all things sleek and sophisticated. 

The full camouflage regalia—ah, yes. Hunting season is upon us, for better or for worse. Especially for fearsome, “mama bear” huntresses, the puffy camo suits necessary for sitting out in the deer blind can completely shatter a streak of style sensitivity and fierce fashion. Out the window (or out the deer blind, as it might be) in the blink of an eye! 

As for the rest of us—the walkers, the runners, the ladies going out to pick up their mail from their box, which means venturing out on to the country lanes and crossing lines of fire—we have to adapt to avoid a “gut fulla lead” by wearing bright colors and even the dreaded fluorescent orange vest! WHAT is a follower of Fierce Miss Jude to do in these extreme and unforgiving circumstances? 

The only advice I can provide is this:

1) when forced to don this necessary evil—this offensive fluorescence—be certain that whatever you are wearing underneath can excuse your crime. It better be pretty darn fierce! Atonement!

2) consider: during the daytime, you can probably wear a bright color that’s not necessarily the fluorescent variety, as long as you aren’t wandering around a hunter’s property or through an obvious cornfield, in which case, better safe than sorry.

But if it is nighttime, even the brightest colors just don’t show up, so prepare to hold your head up high, don the appropriate fierceness underneath, and, well, bite the bullet.  

Love, Fierce Miss Jude